It’s that time of year again. No, I’m not talking about
Christmas, but rather, the brand of awfulness that Christmas attracts…
Honestly, How did this even become a thing?
via GIPHY
“Hey! I have an idea” said the first man in the red apron,
“Let’s make some kind of irritating sound that people can’t ignore!”
The second man in a red apron smiles as he pulls a gleaming
brass bell from his pocket, “Llke this?” he says as he begins to ring it over
and over until the first red aproned man looks as though his head is about to
explode.
“Just like that!”
The second red aproned man’s smile turns from delight to
something much more sinister. “The best part, when they do give us money “to
shut us up,” we won’t stop ringing it. We’ll just keep ringing and ringing and
ringing. Muahahahaha” (Super villain laugh)
Ever wonder why bell ringers always seem to wear ear muffs
or hats to cover their ears? Cold, my ass. It’s to protect themselves from the
suffering they’re inflicting upon the rest of us.
They think they’re so smart.
via GIPHY
This time of year also brings more cars to crowd parking
lots on any given day or time within the month of December. As Angelica and I
were leaving Target the other night, we couldn’t remember where we parked. At
ten o’clock at night, this typically isn’t a big deal, but when the parking lot
is still full, and it’s 2 degrees, this creates more of an issue.
I refuse to wander the parking lot like I’m lost. I just
wont do it. I’ll hold my head up and keep a deliberate stride. Like I’m just
taking a casual stroll, with a cart full of things, and an angry Angelica in
tow. It’s no big deal. I do this all the time. Up and down the rows of frozen
cars. Just taking a walk.
I can’t believe how late into the month it’s gotten and I still
haven’t even wrapped a single present. Not one. I don’t even have a logical
place where I’m hiding them this year. There’s a present in my fruit basket,
just chilling. There’s a few in the living room, one in a closet, and one
that’s taking up the seat of the couch.
Any one else just not feeling it this year?
via GIPHY
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